Big Project! An Update

Hi lovelies!

I’m sitting here drinking coffee, answering emails, making a grocery list, catching up on podcasts, and working on my big project. Remember back last month, I mentioned that I was working on a big project and that is writing a book!

I’ve been slowly chipping away at it, all while taking a few breaks in between and stepping away from it for a few days, but always coming back to add to it. I am still just as excited about it as I was when I decided to go for it months ago. There is also lots of fear, doubt and apprehension sitting right next to wonder, curiosity and excitement, but I’m becoming friends with all those things and am pushing forward. And it feels good.

It’s challenging but I like it and I am feeling more and more comfortable with the process.

So, it’s coming along and I’ll keep you posted on how it’s going. Thanks for coming along!

 

xxTosha

I’m using BookWright to write this baby! It’s a super easy program and very user friendly. Win-win.

 

 

 

 

Posted in Create, Creativity | Leave a comment

Give Me ALL the Pretty Drinkware

Hi guys!

Right now, it’s sunny and 50 degrees outside and feels like a spring day. Which got me thinking about summer and sitting on the back patio, sipping cocktails with Rob and our friends. Which means pretty cocktail glasses.

One of my favorite items to keep stocked in our home bar are drinkware glasses. We entertain a lot and I like to have cute barware items, like cheeky cocktail napkins, unique bottle openers, and pretty glassware on hand. I’ll be adding a few of these drink glasses to our collection and by summer, our bar will have a whole new fun look. Check out what I have on my wish list to make those old fashions, margaritas and gin + tonics all pretty:

1. hobnail texture ombre aqua glass / 2. reposado margarita glass /3. bottoms up stainless steel shot glasses /4. palm cocktail wine glass /5. marta tasting glasses / 6. nouveau gold double old-fashioned glasses / 7. coppertino double old-fashioned glasses / 8. marta light pink double old fashioned / 9. marie coupe cocktail glass

glassware

 

Posted in Favorites, Miscellaneous | Leave a comment

A Friday Quote

You feel that?

Me too.

It’s the Universe, telling you (and me) to get out there and get stuff done.

Point taken.

Here we go.

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Just a Thought……

 

xxTosha

Posted in Inspiration, Love Notes | Leave a comment

My Big Project

Hi guys!

I’m on a little vacation here in the woods surrounded by family, friends, snow and cocktails. In between sledding, having dance parties and game playing, I am working on a project that I started late last year. I’ve told just a couple of people so far but thought I’d share the news with you all too!

I’m writing a book! I can’t believe I’m saying that but tada! I have no idea what I’m doing but so far, it’s been a learning process, but I am having fun with it and am looking forward to seeing where it’ll take me.

Here’s a little sneak peek of what I’m working on:

 

hellobookcover

 

 

Gah! I’m WRITING A BOOK! I’m excited, nervous, curious, but look forward to seeing the end product! I’ll be taking the next six months to finish writing it and putting it together. I’ll be happy to share the journey with you here on the blog.

Thanks for reading!

xxTosha

 

 

 

Posted in Create, Inspiration, Miscellaneous, Self | 1 Response

Hello 2017 + Some Thoughts (PART 2)

Hi guys!

So, about my last post . I’ll be honest…..it left me with a vulnerability hangover a couple of days after I hit that publish tab. For real, I was like “WHAT DID I JUST DO? Can I go and delete the post? Nah, I’ll leave it. But wait! I shared WAY too much and people are going to think I’m SO WEIRD! I’m so confused! I need some chocolate.”

But. Then I came to my senses and thought, “You know what, girl? You did a good thing. You wrote that post for you. You shared your story because you needed to and you did it as a celebration of getting through that tough time in your life.  You did it as a celebration of YOU.” And I feel good about that.

I wasn’t expecting anyone to read it as I don’t blog a lot (which I plan on changing this year) but I needed to write out some things and I thought, I’ll just do it here. BUT people did read it and I got so many lovely comments from it, via email, text and through the blog.

And you know what?

We are all more alike than we are different. Like I said, people go through crap. Life is hard sometimes. People need to be supported, thought of and encouraged. And I hope that, through that post, you see me. And know that I want to see you. I want to be there for you, I want to encourage you, and I want to support you. I want to share my story and if it causes one person to say “I feel the same way”, then that vulnerability hangover is totally worth it. So, thanks for reading that. I got over the hangover in a couple of days and now I feel SO good about what I shared.

Before I continue, I want to say thank you to those that reached out and shared words of encouragement and love with me…..It was like a big hug and I loved it. I appreciate you.

Moving on, I want to share my word of the year with you. I’m super excited about this word! I told you what it was last week but I wanted to go into a little bit more detail on it. I’m still gently moving into this new year with ease, grace and intention and I’ve been enjoying that process of dissecting what I want my year to look like and what I want to accomplish over the course of 2017. I have a journal that I’ve been writing in and I enjoy the deliberate slowing down and thinking that it has forced me to do instead of diving right in and possibly losing momentum before the end of the month. We’ve all been there!

So, my word is PURPOSE. I started with looking up the definition of this word and this is what I found:OLW

Now. I sat with this definition for about a week and looked at it from all sides to see how it would fit into my plans for 2017. I LOVE the definition….especially “what something is used for” and “the reason something exists”…. I got chills when I read this because this is something that I have been thinking about over the last two years, personally, and I am looking for my own purpose and what I am to contribute to the world. I know that I was put here 41 years ago for a reason and I am determined to live out that purpose, on purpose, this year. Yes, I am a wife and a mother, a sister, an aunt, a daughter, a friend. But who am I to myself? I didn’t grow up with the belief that I can do or be anything. A lot of my childhood, I grew up being told what to do and living up to very high expectations that didn’t really allow me to figure out what I want.  So I am teaching myself how to do that now. Better late than never, right?

So, I started with writing down some goals, writing out a “Why” Statement (if you know your WHY, you can make the HOW possible) and writing my “Personal Mission” Statement. And to follow through on all of those, I need to focus on purpose. Things just aren’t going to happen because I wish them to. I have to go out there and purposely do things that will bring my plans into reality. In the mornings now, I wake up and know that I am aiming at my WHY and seeing it written out makes me so excited to get started on the day. People, this never happened before. Ever. I’d get up and go through the motions of my day but at the end, was like “What am I doing for me? Why am I doing what I am doing?” My Personal Mission statement is always in the front of my mind now and it’s my guide on how to go about my day….even down to the most basic thing, like working out. I make a point to schedule in my self care. I make a point to put my phone down and listen to my kids tell me about their day. I am being mindful of what I am reading and watching so that I don’t fill my head and heart with anxiety.

I’m doing these things on PURPOSE to create a life that I love. Like, I want to be in love with my life. Now, my life is pretty fabulous. I have an awesome family, a home that is warm and cozy, my kids are well adjusted and happy, my husband is my best friend and I’m still crazy in love with him even after seeing his face nearly everyday for the past 23 years, I have an amazing group of friends, I get to travel to awesome places….I mean, I can’t complain. BUT. I want to upgrade. I want to live up to my FULL potential and not just go through the motions, you know? And there is nothing wrong with that. I thought I had to be happy with what I have because what I have is so good. But, it’s ok to want more, to want to be more.

 

I want to be an inspiration to those I come in contact with by going after my dreams, being honest and open with my highs and lows and encouraging those around me to be themselves, love themselves, serve others and live well. I know that I was put here 41 years ago for a PURPOSE. I know that I am here to touch lives and to be an inspiration to those around me. I know that I am here to learn more about myself and to love myself and to share that with those I come in contact with. I feel deep in my heart that I am meant for greatness and I will make the intention everyday to live my life in pursuing that greatness with purpose. I will strive to unleash my potential and live my biggest, most honest, real, authentic, and beautiful life. 
Oh, yeaaahhhhh. That up there? That’s what I’m aiming for. And for me, it all starts with PURPOSE. I’m leaning into what that is and I’m using it to guide my choices, thoughts and actions.  I know there will be ups and downs, trials and detours. But I am equipping myself with some tools (emotionally, physically and spiritually) to walk through life with purpose and allowing myself to learn more about it and myself.
Whew! I could go on, but I think I’ll stop here. I plan on sharing a lot more about my journey this year on the blog, so this isn’t the last you’ll hear of my story. I plan on using this space to be an inspiration and build a little community of support, love, fun, fabulousness and life awesomeness. I hope that you’ll come along with me. My husband and a few close friends will probably be the only ones to read these posts but I’m OK with that! If you do read, leave me a comment….I LOVE them and they make me so happy!
I have new plans for the blog, for Hello October and a project that I’m working on that I hope to share with you soon. (I’m SUPER excited about it!) I’ll go more into that on a different day. In the meantime, I’ll be slowly finishing out the rest of January with journaling, self care, love and inspiration to me and those around me.
Thanks SOOOOO much if you read this novel. 😊 I appreciate it. I hope that you are doing well, and are feeling good and I’ll be back soon!
Love,
xxTosha

 

Posted in Inspiration, Life, Self | 4 Responses

Hello 2017 + Some Thoughts (PART 1)

hardstuff

Happy New Year, loves!!

This post is a looooong one, but I feel the need to share some of my thoughts, feelings and heart. This is my blog, so I can write what ever I want, yes? I thought so! Here we go!

The new year came roaring in days ago and I’ve been taking the time to intentionally set myself up for a good year (as much as one can) in 2017. The latter part of 2016 for me was rough. Rough is an understatement, actually. It was ugly and difficult. Painful and emotionally jarring. What started in May 2016 as a little rocky turned into full blown anxiety and depression and tears and barely holding it together as the year neared Thanksgiving. During those 6 months, I tried SO hard to keep my shit together. I’ve struggled with anxiety for a few years but something happened in September that triggered a MAJOR setback and started the scarier part of my spiral downward. I’m not going to share details, but to me, it was painful and it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever been through.

A couple of weeks before Thanksgiving, I went in to see my doctor and tell her what’s been going on and how things had been. I sat in that doctor’s office for 2 hours and cried and listened and cried and shared and cried some more. And can I just say, my doctor is amazing. She is one of the most loveliest people I’ve ever met and has a true heart for the people that she sees and wants them to feel their best while they live their best life. She gave me some things to think about about and shared some advice on a different way of looking at things and I walked out of there feeling better than I had in a while. I actually had some hope that life would start to turn around and that I could actually get out of this dark spiral I was quickly going down and couldn’t seem to pull myself out of. A few days after this visit, the family and I went to Cannon Beach for our annual Family Thanksgiving Feast. I almost didn’t go. I wasn’t feeling up to it, emotionally. But my family – I love them and I look forward to this trip every year. We get to hang out, take walks on the beach (there is something to be said about the ocean. It really is good for the soul.), eat, take trips to the chocolate store for amazing chocolate chip cookies and milkshakes, the kids get to go shopping with their Nonna and Papa, we dance in the kitchen to “Cotton Eye’d Joe”, the cousins all play together, and on our last night there, we enjoy a Thanksgiving meal that we spend all day in the kitchen cooking together. How could I not go? These few days there make my heart happy and I LOVE Cannon Beach.

During that trip, things started to look a bit better as I made some intentional decisions and tried to put myself into a different mindset.  When I got back, I told a few close people what was going on and what I was going through. And that was pretty scary. Everyone wants to look like they have it all together and that life is as pretty as it looks on social media. But it’s not. People hurt. People are in pain. People go through shit. And I am trying to be more honest with myself and with those around me so I thought I’d step so stinkin’ far out of my comfort zone and talk to a few trusted people that I knew would love me, even when I said, “I’m not doing well.” I had a couple of people say “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. I hope that you feel better soon.” And I had a few ask me “What’s going on? I love you and I’m here for you and I want to help you feel better.”  And self care was a biggie for me. I needed to take the action of purposely putting myself first, which is something I am NOT used to at all. Bless my husband for being the biggest support and the kindest, most gentlest man by my side. He held me, he listened, he offered encouragement. This time period wasn’t easy for him, I know. And that was hard to deal with as I didn’t want to be a burden to him…..but he would say “It’s OK. It’s something you can’t help right now.” On top of work and his projects going on, he had this wife that was crumbling and that he was worried about. But he handled it with so much grace and love. This man LOVES this crazy girl and I feel so blessed that he walks beside me in this life through the ups and the downs. Even my kids were SO very understanding and empathetic and so honest in their words explaining to me how they felt seeing their mom “not high on life anymore”.  They were worried…..I could see it in their eyes. I was like “My kids are SO going to be on a therapist couch in a few years!” I talked with them and kept the lines of communication open with them both as much as I could and tried to keep life as normal for them as possible. They were so amazing as well. They would check in on me and ask “Did you do something nice for yourself today?” Or come and just give me an extra hug and kiss randomly throughout the day. I’ve got an amazing family and there is no way I could’ve gotten through that gross period without them. Seriously. Big Terp and Littlest Terps are my TRIBE! (I LOVE YOU! )

nsyncbye

SO LONG 2016!!!

Well, not one to linger long on the negative, I am moving on and said “BYE BYE BYE!” to 2016 with a group of some very special people and am looking ahead with bright eyes, a happy heart and excitement towards 2017 and all that this year has the possibility to be. I am really excited about this year, because honestly, I don’t see how it can’t be good after the 6 month shit show I was in last year.

SO….

That brings be to this – My One Little Word for 2017 (I fell in love with this idea after hearing about it on one of my favorite blogger’s website. If you want to read about it, check it out here.)

Each year instead of making resolutions (because they suck and they don’t get done), I pick one or two words that I want to focus on. A word that I make a real intention on making a part of my year and helps me on my path in the future. Last year, my words were INTENTION and DISCOVERY. This year my word is:

PURPOSE

The last two weeks of last year, I started thinking about what I want my 2017 to look like and feel like. What I want to accomplish, see, do, make, be….all the good things. And in looking at those things, this word came to mind. And so I noted it and filed it away to think about. But I always came back to it. So, I looked up the definition of it and fell in LOVE with the word. Like, it slapped me upside the head and was like “YES!”

So, PURPOSE it is and I am SO excited! I am so excited to work with this word, to infuse it into my daily life and play with it, to enjoy it, to take it apart and dissect it and put it back together in a way that represents me.

I would like to share with you my thoughts on my word and plan on doing that in a PART II of my blog post coming up next week.

Thanks so much if you’ve read this novel….I really appreciate it. I’ll see you next week!

Posted in Uncategorized | 5 Responses

Giving Myself Grace as a Mom

I understand that being a parent has its ups and down, good times and bad, and challenges and easy street moments. Some days, it can blow up in your face and can down right suck. And some days you feel like you got this Mom thing down and you can parent ALLLLLL of the children. 

Tonight, I let some sour spots get the best of me and ended my night in tears, frustration and anger. #human 

My heart hurts because of it. 

As patience runs out, as it did tonight, I can become undone. 

I wish I had more grace, more patience, more understanding, just one more time. 

I just didn’t have it in me tonight. One thing led to another which led to another and with the cumulative backup, something gave and emotions and words came spilling out.

Tonight I got angry and I yelled at my littlest and we went to bed angry with one another. I’m up at this late hour, trying to process some thoughts and think about what happened tonight.

And right now, I am feeling depleted, sad and disappointed. In myself. And in my little boo. But mostly, myself. We’ve all had those days. And will continue to have them. And in the midst of them, we continue to love our children, no matter what. And now, I’m trying to extend that same unconditional love, grace and forgiveness to myself. 

At times, I feel that I am a damn good mom. Other times, I wish I had a do over. (Everyone feels this way, right?)

My do over will be tomorrow morning, when he wakes up, comes downstairs, gives me a hug and says “Hi Mommy.” I will then apologize and hug him right back, say hi and tell him that I love him so much and that I hope we have a better day today. 

And then, I will tell myself that I’m blessed to be his mom. I’m so happy to be his mom. I make mistakes. I’m not perfect. And that today is a new day to get to do it over. I will give myself grace and the forgiveness and the love to have at it another day. 

Parenting is a journey, not a destination. There will be lots of twists and turns, going the wrong way and having to turn around, stopping to get a fill up to continue to get back at it. 

Grace, forgiveness and love. For your family. But, most importantly, for yourself. 

For myself.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Response

Marching On

“How are we going to talk to our kids about this tomorrow?” I ask him Tuesday night while watching the vote numbers come in. Our kids had watched some of the election but as the night went on and since it was a school night, they had to go to bed before it ended. 
The next morning was hard and painful as reality set in.

It’s been a lot of discussion in our home over the last 48 hours on what has happened. And we figured that we’d continue to tell them what we’ve been telling them from the moment they could understand. 

Love people. Stand up for one another. Be kindhearted. Spread good. Stay awesome. Lend a hand to someone in need. Treat everyone with respect. Love yourself. 

Even though we, as a family, are very saddened by what the result is, we feel the best thing to do now is to move forward together – stronger than before. 

Honestly, it’s hard and painful to be brave and move forward when you’re hurt, sad, and heartbroken. But it must be done. I choose to not stay stuck. There are two little people that are watching us and are looking up to us to do the right thing. And I would do ANYTHING for them. I want them to know that there is STILL good in the world and that they are a part of it. 

Here’s to kindness, bravery, respect, marching on and love love love. 

I love you Hope and Nicholas. More than words can say. #bethegood ❤️

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

My Favorite Things About Fall


Fall is my most favorite season of all! It’s the season of:


Pumpkin spice lattes, cozy sweaters, flannel shirts, boots, allllll the cute baby pumpkins, pumpkin patches, colorful trees, low afternoon light, thick scarves, hot apple cider, pumpkin pie, a bowl of homemade chili, rainy nights in bed, warm cozy socks, baking pumpkin bread, long outdoor shadows, passing out candy to trick or treaters, and if we’re being honest, eating said candy (taking all the chocolate from my kids’ stash), having a leaf pile fight, the smell of cinnamon and nutmeg, walking through a corn maze, fall photoshoots in the park, Thanksgiving dinner, sitting by a fire, apple pie, learning to knit, crockpot soup, roasting pumpkin seeds, crunchy leaves, a long weekend at the beach, boozy hot chocolate, reading books….

What are your favorite things about fall?

xxTosha

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment
  • Hello!

    I'm a mom, wife, hugger, creative, and lover of all things awesome + fabulous. Nice to meet you! Thanks for stopping by! Check out "Hello Tosha" to learn more about me.
  • Hello Categories

  • Post Archives

    Looking for more? Browse the Hello Archives